A bereaved mum who lost two babies is determined to turn her ‘pain into purpose’ and use her singing talent to help other parents navigating grief. Laura Levy has found a way to express her feelings through music, writing original songs that keep her children’s memory alive.
She receives support from East Anglia’s Children’s Hospices (EACH) and has struck up a close working relationship with Jane Rous-Milligan, EACH’s Music Therapist at The Nook. Now Laura is sharing her story during national Baby Loss Awareness Week, appearing in a short film that she hopes will inspire others dealing with a similar situation.
“Music therapy has helped so much,” she said. “It’s helped regulate me, and I know that during my sessions I can just be myself. It feels safe and I can express everything I’m feeling. Bereavement support is often time-limited, but grief doesn’t work to a timescale. It isn’t just the moment it happens, or the days and months afterwards. It’s forever. Music therapy has given me that time and space, and it’s allowed me to let my grief move, change and be what it needs to be.
“It’s met every part of my grief – the sadness, the anger, the numbness and the love. It takes time, but it’s also allowed me to turn pain into purpose and that’s why I want to share my story with others going through similar losses. If it helps even one person feel less alone, then that’s something I’d be honoured to be part of.”
Laura and partner John have endured a series of devastating losses in recent years, beginning with the death of their daughter, Emilia, who was born at 20 weeks in November 2023. Just six months later, they lost their son, Harrison, who was born alive at 22 weeks and died after just two precious hours. Both losses stemmed from complications caused by a weakened cervix, following treatment for CIN3 cells around a decade ago. Despite undergoing specialist treatment in the hope of carrying future pregnancies to term, Laura later experienced further heartbreak after a missed miscarriage following eight weeks of pregnancy in 2025. Then, earlier this year, she also lost her father, compounding the grief she was already carrying.
“Losing Harrison brought back the grief of losing Emilia, and when my dad died, it intensified my grief for both Emilia and Harrison,” she said. “It also meant I was grieving as both a daughter and a mother. Each loss seems to carry the others with it. It’s impacted all areas of my life. I couldn’t go back to work or the life I had before because I’d changed and so had everything around me. Even when time passes, you still feel like it’s only just happened. I’ll see mums and dads with their children and the grief opens up again. I feel like I’m constantly battling the outside world, which can leave me feeling isolated.”
While family and friends became her lifelines, Laura says music has helped her find a voice for her feelings.
“We listened to the singer-songwriter Rumer on the painful drive home from losing our babies,” she said. “Music is how I express my deepest emotions and in that moment Rumer beautifully articulated the grief I couldn’t put into words. Music and singing has always been a part of who I am. Even as a tiny child, my dad would sing to me and music became a sacred bond between us right up until he died.
“I was offered music therapy sessions at The Nook with Jane and that was the start of my songwriting journey. It’s led me to write five deeply personal pieces inspired by my children. It was incredibly moving to be part of a creative process that allowed me to say exactly what I wanted to say.”
Among the five songs Laura has written, Dance of Light holds particular significance, capturing the lasting connection she feels with Harrison and Emilia. It was inspired by the extraordinary circumstances surrounding Harrison’s birth and death, on 11th May 2024, when the Northern Lights illuminated the skies above East Anglia.
“Harrison survived for two hours,” said Laura. “For that time, John and I cuddled our son while the lights filled the skies. For me, it represented the spiritual dimension of lost loved ones and Emilia coming to take Harrison into the sky. He lit up our world.
“For the funeral, John wrote a poem about Harrison and the Aurora and that’s what I transformed into Dance of Light. Each time I sing it, it’s a reconnection to him and Emilia. It makes me feel like their mum, and I’m connecting with them.”
Key to her journey was Laura’s relationship with EACH Music Therapist Jane, whose encouragement helped transform her thoughts and raw emotion into deeply personal songs.
“I initially met Jane at a pamper night here at The Nook,” said Laura. “We talked about my losses but also my love of music and singing. I started to write lyrics and poetry about how I was feeling and shared them with her. Using improvised music, with Jane at the piano and me exploring melodies using the words I’d written, parts of songs started to take shape. It was really exciting and poignant all at the same time.”
Alongside the support she received at EACH, Laura is quick to acknowledge the people who have stood beside her through every step of her bereavement journey.
“John, her Mum, family and my best friend, Nicola, have been my lifelines,” she said. “They’ve picked me up when I’m on the floor. They’ve embraced the new me and not pressurised me to be anything different. They’ve walked with me through the worst days and continue to do so.
“Another thing that’s helped me is my teddy bears. My bereavement support worker, Racheal Crane, who is now the developer and director of Max’s Legacy, a service focused on improving bereavement care, staff support and family aftercare following pregnancy and baby loss, in memory of her little boy, Max, arranged for Emilia and Harrison’s ashes to be placed inside them. They’ve become a source of great emotional support for both myself and John.
“They’re incredibly important to me and a physical representation of my losses. I hold and hug them on days when my grief is really loud. They’re something physical to touch when my arms feel empty.”
For Jane, it’s been a privilege to witness Laura’s journey, seeing how music has helped her process experiences that changed every aspect of her life. Their relationship has become a creative partnership, enabling her to transform grief, memories and love into original songs honouring Emilia and Harrison.
“Working with Laura has been a great privilege,” said Jane. “From the outset, I could feel how much sorrow she was carrying and how deeply she needed a space where her grief could be expressed, heard and held. I had an intuitive sense that she had her own music inside her, and that there was a more direct and personal way for her to express her grief.
“Over time, using her own words and poetry, parts of songs began to emerge and take shape. It was incredibly moving to watch Laura find her own music and, through that music, find a way to tell her story. The music became a kind of container for feelings that at times felt overwhelming. She’s incredibly committed to moving forward, with a real sense of turning pain into purpose. She wants to speak to others who’ve experienced loss and send the message that they’re not alone.
“I feel honoured to have witnessed Laura finding her voice, her music and her way of carrying her story forward.”
Watch Laura’s film here.
