A dedicated volunteer whose grandson received end-of-life care from East Anglia’s Children’s Hospices (EACH) says it is a privilege supporting the charity in his Will.
Tony Golding has spent the last quarter of a century raising funds and awareness of EACH, giving his time to support events, speak publicly about his experiences and help out at The Treehouse.
He was treasurer of the Ipswich Friends Group – a body set up to raise funds – and is now sharing his story to help promote the return of a powerful TV advert and hospice Wills campaign.
The ‘This is Hospice Care’ campaign is a collaboration between 143 adult and children’s hospices across England, Scotland and Wales, brought together by Hospice UK.
The advert first aired last year and is now being shown again throughout the next three weeks, designed to change perceptions and inspire long-term support for organisations like EACH by encouraging people to consider a gift in their Will.
Tony’s grandson, Sammy, died in 2000, aged just nine months. He had Spinal Muscular Atrophy and received care at Walker Close – EACH’s former Ipswich hospice.
“We made the decision to update our Wills last year,” said Tony, who lives in Felixstowe.
“It was something we’d been meaning to do for a while and were then prompted following some deaths in our wider family.
“After myself and my wife have passed, our estate will be divided between our two children and three living grandchildren – and Sammy’s share will be coming to EACH.
“We’ve also included a ‘total disaster’ clause, whereby the charity will inherit everything in the worst-case scenario.
“It’s a substantial amount and something we wanted to do in Sammy’s memory.
“Leaving a legacy gift is something I’d recommend to anyone.
“It’s an extremely personal decision and not one to take lightly, but I know what a difference it can make.
“It takes such an enormous amount of money to run EACH.
“The figures are eye-watering, so anything people can leave genuinely helps. If I won the lottery, I’d give much more.”
Sammy was born in November 1999 – a beautiful blue-eyed son to Tony and wife Beryl’s daughter, Rachel, and son-in-law, Adam. He was their first grandchild.
It was after four months concerns were raised about his health.
“It was Beryl who said something first, as she spent a lot of time with Sammy,” said Tony, 77.
“She noticed he couldn’t sit up on his own and seemed a bit floppy.
“Sammy’s doctor then referred him to hospital, and everything happened very quickly from there. Soon after, we were told it was Spinal Muscular Atrophy.
“It was devastating, but, as a family, we decided to make the very most of the time we had together.
“I remember one day taking Sammy on a steam train at Bressingham and having a holiday in Evesham, Worcestershire.
“While we were there, we met a lady from the Jennifer Trust, a small charity raising awareness of SMA in nearby Stratford Upon Avon.
“It gave us more insight about the condition and what was to come.
“Towards the end of Sammy’s life, we were then put in touch with EACH – a charity I was already aware of, albeit from a distance.
“It was a key moment but hard to accept. At the time, I only associated a hospice with end-of-life care, which was scary and upsetting.
“A date was set to give me an opportunity to visit Walker Close (which had only been open a year).
“As soon as I arrived, I remember a member of the care team giving me a big hug and showing me Sammy’s room.
“His name was already on the door, which struck me as a very kind and personal touch.
“It was such a welcoming environment, and my first impressions were as positive as they could possibly be, in the circumstances.
“I knew he’d be in safe hands and was instantly impressed by the levels of care and compassion.”
Tony, Beryl and their family eventually spent three and a half weeks at the hospice with Sammy.
He remembers it as ‘quality time’ and knows that without such support, their experience would have been very different.
It was the start of a journey that led to Tony becoming a much-loved, respected and dedicated volunteer, including doing lots of public speaking and openly sharing his experiences.
“The dust never truly settles, and the pain and emotion never disappear,” he said.
“However, I decided at the time there were two things I wanted to do related to children.
“Firstly, I wanted to become a school governor, which was something I went on to do for eight years.
“Secondly, I wanted to get involved with EACH. It’s an extraordinary charity – one that’s there for people when they need it most.
“The staff consistently go above and beyond and appear to see their roles as a privilege, rather than a job.
“Privilege is a word I use a lot when I talk about EACH, because that’s also the way I feel about volunteering.
“It’s very important to me, and I want other families, now and in the future, to experience the same care and support that we did.”
Tony met HRH The Princess of Wales – then The Duchess of Cambridge – when she officially cut the ribbon at The Treehouse in March 2012.
He then had a second brush with royalty when he and Beryl were invited to a Buckingham Palace garden party in May 2019, meeting both The Prince and Princess of Wales (then The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge).
“EACH has grown enormously over the years, and I’m proud to have a been a small part of that journey here in Ipswich,” said Tony.
“I also consider myself very lucky, which seems an odd word to use when you think of the reason I first got involved.
“However, that’s certainly the way I feel about my involvement with EACH.
“I like spending time here, and I’ve met some incredible people along the way.”
To leave a Gift in your Will to EACH, like Tony, visit here.
